Friday, June 22, 2007

Almost a Walk in the Park

Day 4 Smoke Free / Chantix Day 16. Each day so far has been a little better, and the secret for me to avoid those almost craving level desire to smoke in the evenings does seem to be to take the second dose of the day earlier. Right now I'm taking the first pill around 8AM and the second pill around 5PM, and that seems to be the sweet spot. I've been staying up until midnight or 1AM (or later... clearly the drowsy side effect is not hitting me), and it hasn't seemed to feel like it's somehow worn off by then. In fact, even in the morning I'm still OK. It's funny, I used to spend most of my morning shower time thinking about having that first smoke of the day. Now I grab something to eat (me, the non-breakfast eater) so that I can take my pill. I've even gotten used to eating something now, so that's probably just another good habit to develop - most important meal of the day and all.

Last night I felt like I had so much more energy than usual. Even during the work day I didn't feel that drain from staying up too late. I guess no longer sucking on poison makes my body more energized - who knew. In any case, I, she who does not exercise, went for a quick walk last night that turned into 2 miles because it felt so damn good on about 800 levels. Just walking and getting exercise makes me feel good when I do it, but even better was breathing in as I went and smelling the grass that had been cut earlier in the day and really feeling like I was actually BREATHING! I know that even smokers breathe, but this was different. I felt it at the core. Best of all the place where we moved couldn't be any more perfect for these kind of power walks because there are always plenty of people out running or pushing a stroller or walking a dog, and there is also a decent amount of traffic and homes right there, too, so it feels safe. I've even joined the little group of walkers at work for what I call my "mid-morning 20 minute mile" just in case I don't do so well at sticking with the walking in the evenings thing. I've walked more miles in 24 hours than I probably usually do in a month or more.

Side note/rant. Even though there are plenty of nature trails easy enough to get to in the area, I'm always leery of walking on them alone, even in daylight and even though other people do go out there quite a bit - problem is there's no promise that they'll jog by at the time I'm there and meet up with Mr. Creepy. I'm overly cautious about such things, but even though everyone really should be, I have very good reasons for how I am - one time, in a story for another day involving a man in a green jacket back when I lived in Japan, it turns out that I was dead right to be paranoid and act accordingly, and it probably saved my life. He didn't want to practice his English with me; of that I'm sure. Aside from all that, I watch the news about what goes on out in our sick world. I'm by no means a recluse. I refuse to let my fear of what can happen to me actually paralyze me and keep me from going about my business, but at the same time, I am usually pretty aware of all kinds of possibilities whenever I am in public, and I try to be as prepared as anyone can be in case it happens. My mindset is why it absolutely kills me when I see women set their purses in a shopping cart and walk away from it just a bit down the aisle to the box of Pop Tarts, basically sending out an invitation for someone to steal their stuff (or these days identity with it), thinking it can't happen because they only look away for an eensy weensy wittle second or because it's daytime or because it's a nicer store in a nicer area or blah, robbed you blind, blah. Get with it ladies! Carry your purse close to your body and where you will at least know if someone is reaching in or taking the whole damn thing. I'd be another 1000 words on the issue of how now to act while walking out to your car that you can't find by making it clear to anyone looking that you are lost and not paying attention, so I'll leave that for another day - maybe on man in the green jacket in Japan day.

OK, now back to what I was trying to say before you distracted me.

Not smoking and doing it while taking Chantix is incredible. I've described it as not quite a walk in the park because there really are some tough times, and it's not a "magic pill," but it's close enough to it that I'm really happy not to be smoking, and I'm really enjoying my nice smelling and deeper breathing walks. Without having to carry cigarettes everywhere I go, I also won't really need a purse much of the time either. Just another perk.

3 comments:

  1. Haha, I know, right, eating in the mornings is becoming a strong habit, since you have to eat to take Chantix. I like that habit! Honey, we'll get past this crazy addiction! PS I was wondering whatever happened to you yesterday!

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  2. I think yesterday was the first time I have eaten breakfast since I was like 15. My coffee has been breakfast for years. Needless to say I have no plans on giving up the coffee though...

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  3. I have always been a coffee for breakfast kind of girl since about high school, too. I'm thrilled that I *have* to eat to take the Chantix and that I'll be on it long enough that I hope breakfast will be as normal of a habit for me as not sucking on poison.

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