Today is Smoke-free Day 186 (even if it's almost bedtime).
What a very long and very crazy day. About a million times today the old me would have stepped out to pace in a square while I smoked and mentally organized (stressed out). That was a favorite of mine. Maybe the lack of pacing is another element of my weight gain since quitting smoking (still better smoke-free, just saying, is all). Instead of smoking or pacing, I found myself automatically taking some deep breaths today. I mean really Deep Breaths. All the way into my lungs, even, I'll admit, pretending at one point that it was a nice big drag from a nice... but it wasn't; it was just good ol' plain not bad for you air. And it still filled that void where I used to feel like I "needed" a cigarette and "had to" go suck poison into my lungs. This trick of breathing that I learned a few quits back, long before Chantix and almost as effective (almost), still works every single time.
It makes sense, I suppose, since breathing is calming and centering (or whatever fancy term) all on its own, in addition to being a nice substitute for people who used to smoke. Turns out those times I thought I "needed" to smoke, I probably just needed to stay put, stay focused on the task at hand and simply take a deep breath. Or ten. I'm sure it's more productive, too, than running away and thinking about an issue to death while outside pacing instead of just working on it. No wonder I got so damn much accomplished.
Blah, goodnight. Is it Friday yet? Santa is almost here!