Wednesday, March 19, 2008

How to Turn $1.03 into Minus 7 Lattes

Dear My Credit Card Company:

After choosing the wrong one of my bank accounts from which to make my online payment several months ago (as in, choosing the bank account not even remotely near my home and with about $1.03 in it, but the bank who, thankfully, covered the larger than $1.03 payment - wouldn't that have been a kick in the knickers if they hadn't covered it... - but then they charged me $26.00, rightfully, because I was an airhead, and that's the going rate on stupid), I am now *always* *extra* careful to choose the correct bank account for source of payment because mailing a check to that wrong bank from which payment was incorrectly taken as the only solution at the time (before I linked up them sisters) was a pain in my ass (I don't write checks; this is the two thousands or the tens or whatever the hell we call this time that's no longer those old fogie 90's). All that kind of mish mash fuddle muck causes neurotic freaks like me to become stressed out and have that old thinking thought about wanting to smoke at people/banks/my not always bright self (but I don't smoke any more, actually today is smoke-free day 276, and I hit 9 months yesterday - yay me! - thanks to Chantix, blogpals, and my stubbornness mostly from my dad's side).

Anyway. As I was trying to explain.

I was very careful this time several days ago, as always (well, always since the above fiasco). So painstakingly careful, as always. I chose the correct account, hit "go" (that's "enter" to y'all's webdesigner folks), and walked away. After not very long (about the time it takes to eat a bowl of porridge - yes, really, yummy and healthy porridge - and give all the cats some lovin' since they, too, miss Tom), I decided to be bold and increase the amount of my scheduled payment because, you know, after entirely too blasted long, Tom has a J-O-B now (run, pick your deity of choice, and we'll do whatever little song/dance/that thing with the candle of praise together at said deity).

What I didn't realize, apparently, is that when you change the dollar amount, feeling all happy that you are bumping it up a bit, being responsible, paying less in interest (I have a spreadsheet for that, too, of course), soundly taking care of your biznatch (wait, that means something entirely different, doesn't it?) - yah, well, when you are doing all that? You are apparently confronted again with the "from which bank account shall this upgraded payment be made" choice, except that it must not be displayed so plainly, and instead it must be pretty damn subtle. Far more subtle than the first go when I was in super careful mode.

Nope, so subtle that I didn't realize that. Definitely didn't realize that. At least not until the bastard charge kept not appearing when I checked my bank account on the onlines. So I got smart. I checked that *other* bank account. You know, the one with the $1.03 in it? Yep, that bitch is overdrawn by the exact amount of my generous payment. Minus the $1.03. And now plus $26.00 punishment salt to wound overdraft fee. Then, carry the 1, and multiply by the square root of how many damn lattes that little boo boo cost me (roughly 7, depending on number of shots and other variables).

Why didn't I just delete that rogue account to protect me from future self? Entirely too long story ('cuz you know I'm all about the brevity) involving how long it would take to re-set-up that second bank as a payment source if I got mad at my main bank (which, yah, separate post, I have; surprising, I know). So I left the derelict $1.03 account in place as just a potential method of payment and tried to just be careful to never, not ever, select it. And I was careful. But we saw how that turned out, now didn't we?

In closing, Dear My Credit Card Company, I would just like to ask that you make your fancy online system assume that if I change my mind about the $ amount of a payment I'm making to you fine folks that I'm *not* also changing the goddamn source of said effing payment unless I do the online equivalent of dancing naked on your desk except for a lime green boa and holding a sign between my... doing something really blatant to indicate that I am intentionally and purposefully doing so. Otherwise, assume no, I'm not.


Not a Happy Maggie


  1. Ummmm....maybe you should stick like $50 in that other account. In case you are forced by the evil whims of the bastard credit card cretins to make such an error again.

  2. Even with $50 in the account I would have been desperately overdrawn since the payment was lots bigger than $50. Now, if I could spare an extra $1000 or so, I'd be golden because I pretty much never make that big of a payment ;)

  3. I'm sorry, but that was hilarious, I love, "...hit go..." Bahahaha.

  4. Thanks, huckdoll. Yah, it's almost funny now. Almost.

    Janet, I'm glad I'm not alone...

  5. Our world is made up of numbers, codes, passwords, logons, blah-blah-blah.
    If we get this mixed up, imagine what it's like for the over 65 crowd (would that be right) and how confusing this has to be for them.
    When you call a business it takes an act of congress to talk with anyone and then they fill you with double talk too.

    I'm sorry Maggie, can we help?

  6. Amen, Kathryn. Sucky.

    Thanks, MamaFlo. I think I'll survive. I'm really just out the $26 overdraft fee (about 7 lattes), totally my own fault. Well, mostly ;)

  7. Sorry for your misfortune, it was a funny story though. *Most* credit card companies will allow you to delete that account from your available payment options. It might be worth looking into :-)

  8. Thanks, Brandie. I could easily delete the $1.03 account as a payment method, but the problem is how long it would take to set it up again if I needed to use it, especially if I needed to do that in time to make a payment from it. That's the only reason I haven't already deleted it. With my other credit card company, it's easy to add a new one instantly, so there it's not an issue.

  9. I had to stop paying any bills online, because it got to the point where I would launch my laptop across the room. (She's okay, though.)

  10. Yikes, Amanda! Glad the laptop is OK because that would be some real sadness.

  11. Omigosh. I would be tearing my hair out.
    But 2 positives come right to mind:
    1)You gave us all a good laugh (which ex smokers need comedy) &
    2) 9 months no smoking. Wowee!
    I am not even worthy of retorting at my measly 10 days

  12. Thanks, Jude! You are doing great, and I'm almost not even mad anymore.

  13. I'm usually EXTRA careful with our accounts, but I've gotten hit with the $26.00 fee once.

    At least if I overdraw (or *ahem* Mr. C uses the joint account without telling me) the credit union only charges $.50 to cover it from our savings account.

    I love credit unions!!

  14. Amen, Jen. Thankfully this other "bank" account actually was a credit union, or it would have been much worse - transfer fee and insufficient funds both. They only charged $3.00 to transfer the $0.04 from savings, but that $0.04 wasn't enough to help ;)

  15. I have done the same thing. I also "bounced" a payment because I FORGOT to change the debit card number when we got the new one. I hate getting old!

  16. One more positive to add, your overdraft fee was only 26 dollars and not the 35 our new business bank account charges. My husband forgot about the 7 day hold they required on deposits; they covered the two checks in a brand new account at only 35 per check - and then the bank released the hold about 7 hours and two phone calls later than promised.

  17. Ouch, Marcia. Yes, it could have been way worse.

  18. Thanks, Rebecca. Yes, it wasn't my favorite moment of the week :)


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