I got it in my head at some point yesterday that I couldn't live without trying this Apple, Onion and Bratwurst recipe (**update**-my review is within that recipe link 4 out of 5 stars with changes for next time) because I love brats, it's been too hot to cook (this a week after I was wearing my winter pjs because it was in the 60's), the recipe calls for only 6 very non-complex or involved or mysterious or hard to find ingredients (oil, brats, onions, garlic, apples and beer - boom, dinner). Bonus points for one of those ingredients being beer.
After a long day of work I ventured out to the store in my no air conditioner having car with a mission of buying bratwurst, apples and beer because I always have onions, oil and garlic on hand (and I'm thinking having the others on hand wouldn't be an all bad idea, either). I spent about $20, drove in a hot car to a hot home and realized that of that $20, I'd spent approximately $0 on bratwurst. I could tell you a story about a large woman with a large cart monopolizing the sausage area as the reason I walked past it, but I'm the dummy that got distracted by $20 worth of "ooh, pretty colors and shiny things" other than bratwurst, and I forgot to circle back over there.
I took a few brief moments to relax in my hot apartment while having negative self-dialog (that's a word, right, for talking to myself?) about my intelligence or lack thereof, got back in my hot ass car, entered the refreshing coolness of the grocery store to right my wrong and to procure a simple package of bratwurst. It was so nice and so cool in there that I lingered, picked up a few other shiny things, spent about $13 and realized halfway to my car this time that I really have the attention span of a bowl of coconut pudding (which I almost bought but in the end did not buy, since, I mean, I was about to also not buy the damn bratwurst for the second time, either). Yes, I'm that spectacularly brilliant on a hot day.
Catching my mistake mid-parking lot was at least more efficient than getting all the way home to my still hot apartment, so I put what I had in the car, entered the store and allowed myself only to go to where the bratwurst lives, nowhere else, and to come directly home after school, did I understand,
Gotta Be Effing Kidding Me
Happily home and playing with my new apple corer thingy (part of the first $20, which actually was well spent at least - there will be more new recipes attempted this week at my house if you are free for dinner) and delighting at making apple ring slices while considering the possibilities and browning the brats and the garlic and singing cat songs in my head and randomly out loud, I grabbed an onion to slice, and... The inside? Rotted to hell and possibly coming back to life to kill us all. Grabbed the second and last onion with the same evil results.
If the sausage hadn't already been browning, I would have aborted and abandoned the mission for the night, but once the sausage is browning you've sort of made a commitment (minus the rings and the dress and the dj). So, I went to a different store just
As I type this, dinner is cooking happily away in the crock pot, and all I can say is that after $40, self-loathing (OK, kidding, I still love my dumb self) and countless hours meandering around in grocery stores, it better taste fabulous, or, or... well, or something. If not, there is always the beer and beef jerky bites option, I suppose. Options are good.
Also, today is smoke-free day 416, and I love sausage. And beer.