I've finally been bitten by the Facebook bug, and it's great seeing people on there that I haven't seen in 20-ish years (because I'm getting older like that), but it's also given me pause. It's a lot to think about seeing all these people and where they are in their lives. It's a lot on a lot of levels.
One, among 8 million other things that is tossing around in my mind, is seeing all these people I knew now having bunches of kids everywhere and suspecting I'll possibly never have pictures of cute little kids to share with the world (even if I could have been voted most likely to have gotten knocked up back in the day - irony is fun). I'll be honest and risk being a little heavy right here, even right before the New Year, but this is a wound I'm constantly cleaning so that it doesn't get infected with envy or sorrow. I think I've struck an OK balance most days, but being childless when it's the exact opposite of what you want does pretty much suck. I try not to talk about it too much because it's pretty much a downer, and I tend to be pretty upbeat, but I like being real, too. Maybe I'll show you more of that side in 2009 to see if I don't scare you away. Maybe I won't feel the need since the hardest part of it is in the past. Supposedly. We'll see.
In general, though, back to this people I used to know and now seeing them on Facebook, it's so odd how you just never really know what life will give you, where events will take you or, more importantly, what you'll do with it as a result. Those who had it so going on didn't necessarily become CEO-type people, and those who didn't have it going on didn't necessarily end up "failures." It's just interesting. Because you. just. never. know.
Sadly, I'm finding out that some of us in my graduating class of 1990 will never even see 40 years old. It's eerie to think about who we have lost and in what ways, some I felt connected to somehow, and some who were just faces I remember seeing in the hall. It's really got me thinking. Again. Deep stuff.
There's more, but this is already approaching rambling, and I don't mean it to be depressing. There's no real point other than that maybe it's appropriate headed out of an old year into a new year thinking about where I've been, where I'm going and what I can do to make the most of every single day of 2009.
Thank you, dear readers, for reading. For your friendship. For being on my journey with me. For allowing me on yours. For everything.
Be safe tonight, OK?
Happy New Year